I'm A Good Citizen Because I Recycle

All right, I don't really recycle. Not cans or bottles or boxes, but I'm going to recycle a post (or at least part of a post) from Still A Pretty Girl. It was titled Conversations and was just random conversations that I have had with Brian that I find amusing. Anyway here they are:

One day Brian called me while I was at work, after he came home from his class.

"Hi."

"Hi, how was class?"

"It was okay. I came home and your fucking dog has shit all over the place. It's on the cupboards."

"Okay."

Silence. Silence. Silence. Twenty minutes later...

"Okay, I'm going to go a clean this up."

"Alright, I'll see you when I get home."

Brian and I before I left for work.

"Is this outfit too slutty for work?"

"Sluttiness isn't what you wear, it's a state of being. So, yes."

This is something I wish I hadn't known. Anyway, there were black spots on my yellow wall. How curious.

"Brian, why are there black marks on the wall? What could this possibly be from?"

"It might be from when I was trying to kill a spider with the lighter, but I can't be sure."

Hmm, that's all I have right now. Sorry I'm a bore.

My Insanity

I actually had a long entry written and ready to post. I'm no longer going to post it because when I looked over it I sound mean. And other things which I won't write. Okay, I sound way bitchy. Really bitchy as a matter of fact, which I have been for the past week. Yes, PMS could be a huge part of the insanity, but I hate it. Anyway, I'm not going to post what I wrote and I actually feel a little better about everything after I wrote it, so there's no need. Instead, I'm going to post my horoscope which was delivered to my inbox this morning. It's fitting:

In between trying to juggle your family situation and your personal needs, you'll need to deal with a most unusual personality right now. So you'll be busy -- so handle it.

And there's why I didn't want to post my original entry. That's all I have today.

Only Happy Thoughts

I have not written for what seems like forever. Alright it’s only been a week, but that’s a pretty long time for me. I haven’t had too much to write about. I haven’t had anything inspirational happen. It’s been the same old thing, everyday, every night.

That has inspired me. I like the same old thing. Especially right now. The same old thing has been really great lately. My day consists of waking up much too early, getting ready for work, going to work, trying to get a workout in at lunch, eating lunch, leaving work, coming home, making dinner, eating dinner, watch a few shows, and going to bed. I know it sounds completely boring. I’m wrong I don’t actually pay much attention to the routine part of my day. It’s the things that happen in between that have made me happy.
Here’s the things that have enjoyed lately:

-Going out to lunch with Brian last week.
-Having him bring me delicious cookies to work “just because”.
-Going to Riley’s class and helping the teacher for an hour. Even if it was only for an hour.
-Calling my messages and having one of them be from Brian, who never leaves messages. Not only did he leave a message, but it was a sweet dopey message at that.
-I like that I made a list on the 18th, for things to do on the 18th and only 3 of the 6 things have been done and it’s already the 20th.
-Trying to cook/bake new recipes I never imagined that I would try, even though some have come out horribly. That’s actually quite disappointing, but hey, at least I tried.
-Going to my mom’s to help her clean while she sews costumes to for the kids. I can’t wait until Halloween.
-Decorating for Halloween, with Brian’s help of course.
-Not having to worry about pervert guy at work because amazingly if you act somewhat hostile and aloof, even stupid creepy guys know to lay off. Nice!

Not that my life is perfect, there have been things that have made me quite upset. For instance, I’m having issues with Riley and Darby right now that have me pretty unsettled, but I hope to get worked through those quickly. And it’s the last week of my birth control pill which makes every emotion more intense and crazy. So my mood is off balance--a little. Upsetting means twice as upsetting as usual and sappy love feelings are also a little more defined. See my happy list? Sappy. But, Brian’s been really sweet about everything lately so I decided to write a few things down. Oh, and the reason he knows that I haven’t been working out as much as usual is because he sees me naked every night and he pays attention to me. Just thought I would throw that in.

Instincts

Last week, during Toastmasters, the table topics subject was words of wisdom. The woman leading the table topics spoke of a time when someone gave her advice and she didn't take it and looking back she wished she had. This had me thinking about what advice, or words of wisdom, I would pass on to someone. Trust your instincts. I know this is completely generic, but it's seriously something that you should be thinking about at all times. When something doesn't feel right, there's a reason. Here's my example:

Brian has a class from 4-6 every Monday and one afternoon last summer he was getting ready to leave. At 3:45 we said our goodbyes and gave our customary goodbye kisses. (Customary because we never leave the house with out goodbye kisses--ever. Not because it's simply a habit.) Anyway, Brian drove off to go to his class. I was on the internet and was messing around, reading blogs and horoscopes and such. I was also getting ready to leave and go to Brian's parent's house. We were going to meet there after his class, have dinner and take care of the dogs because his parents were out of town. I remember I closed all the windows down, except for one, on the internet and left that open to a random blog I was reading. I went downstairs to pack up some things that were needed for dinner. I ran back upstairs, where I had the laptop. It was sitting on the bed. I thought it so strange that there were two windows open, one to the random blog the other on Yahoo. Hmm, I guess I left a window open. I thought I had closed all but the one. Suspicious? Why would it be? I'm here by myself. I turned to the closet where I noticed someone standing and then suddenly lunging towards me. In this split second I thought to myself, "I'm going to die because I didn't trust myself about closing the windows." Well, luckily it was only Brian. His class was cancelled and he thought it would be funny to scare the crap out of me.

I know it sounds like a long thought to be thinking in the split second from the time Brian lunged and the moment I knew it was him, but that's what I was thinking. That this could have all been avoided had I walked in the room, noticed something was not right, turned around and walked out the door. From now on I'm going to listen to the little voice that tells me to leave now. Trust your instincts.

I have another word of wisdom for you: never do anything half assed. It will come back to haunt you.

Today Was The Same But Different

I went to Riley's school today to volunteer in his class room. It was pretty fun. Most definitely interesting. I could never be in charge of a bunch of seven year olds day in and day out. Never. They don't sit still. They're little wiggle worms. The teacher, Miss Fox, was constantly saying, "please sit down, please be quiet." This is just an observation. I'm not saying that anything is wrong with the situation, just that it's amazingly difficult. My appreciation for teachers has increased. I'm excited to be going back in two weeks. Plus, it made me happy that the minute Riley saw me he ran up and gave me a big hug.

Other news: It is rumored that Nick is leaving Jessica because she was offered a role on The Dukes of Hazard (sp?) and Nick was not. Supposedly she's quite boisterous about her acomplishments and he's fed up. (This was heard by a co-worker on the radio this morning. I have yet to find a story on the net confirming details.) Whatever, Nick. He should just sit back and enjoy his life. She is making mega dollars that he can be spending. He should retire and make the most of his life. He doesn't have it so bad. Yes, her career is sky rocketing while his is stagnant, but get over it. He has a hot, rich wife and I'm sure he must be doing better than some of us financially. Stupid. That's all I have to say on the matter.

I'm watching the post debate debates. The debates are actually entertaining. I know it doesn't seem like they should be, but there's everything you could possibly want from a show--drama, humor, and information. Alright, back to playing internet games, uh, I mean watching the debates.

Family

Alright, book time. I have finished reading Naked by David Sedaris...Finally. It's taken a couple of months, not because it's uninteresting. It's actually quite amusing, but this reading thing is hard for me to grasp. I always have "better" things to do. These things may include cleaning or making dinner or working, but most likely it involves watching a TV show and drinking a beer. But that's neither here nor there. I've finished the book.

Sedaris is an intriguing person. However, it's somewhat difficult for me to relate to his essays. Don't get me wrong I understand the humor and find it humorous, but I think the fact that he's a man who hates driving and has hitch hiked across the country is a little weird and hard to relate to. But that may be just me. However, the parts I really enjoyed involved his family. The first chapter is the one that had me hooked. In the first essay, Chipped Beef, he talks about how he didn't believe he fit in with his family. Here's a little snippet of my favorite part.

The life I had been offered was completely unacceptable, but I never gave up hope that my
real family might arrive at any moment, pressing the doorbell with their white-gloved
fingers. "Oh, Lord Chiselchin," they'd cry, tossing their top hats in celebration, "thank God
we've finally found you.""

I know exactly what he's talking about. Of course my daydreams of my "real" family coming to find me were equally as extravagant, but I always believed more realistic. I was adopted. Somewhere out there was a biological family that belonged to me. In my imagination they could be whatever I wanted them to be. And they have been everything. They have held every occupation imaginable and been of various heritage. My imagined family has even been from several different cultures, mainly because I'm not exactly sure which descent I'm from. There's no way to know for sure. Hispanic and Italian are the most popular race I have dreamed up, but I'm pretty much open for suggestion because I don't believe these descriptions actually fit my features. But, these are my thoughts, right? I can make them whomever I wish.

My "real" family has always been super rich and lived in wonderful houses with servants and horses and every type dog imaginable, because I have always loved dogs. They find me and want to give me millions of dollars and I always accept the gift and live out my life in Boise, with my adopted family, in great wealth. It's funny, I have these great daydreams of this nonexistent family to find me and in the end I just want what I basically have now. Okay, I have much more money and my life involves never working ever again and shopping everyday, but seriously that's not too far-fetched from what I do now. It's just on a much larger scale.

Of course, there are several other characteristics about my family that make me know I'm not exactly like them. The potluck wedding reception is one. The fact that my sisters are like a million feet tall and I'm 5'4". I have dark hair and they have blonde. My mom finds it perfectly acceptable to have a kitchen full of dirty dishes and my father is, well he's insane most of the time. (I'm not exactly sure how to expand on that.) When I was little I remember my parents saying things such as, "God put us in the families we were suppose to be in. It's predetermined which family we belonged to." I always pointed out that I wasn't born into this family, I was adopted. My mom told me that was true, but I somehow found my way to them and that was where I belonged. I always thought I got ripped off.

I know, totally cheesy. That's not what I was going for, but my point is this, I think that my family needs me. They need the oddball to help them go in the right direction. You know, the direction I think they should be going. Right! They never listen to me. But my mom always knows I will come do her dishes and my dad knows that I'm always willing to be taken to lunch and my sisters and brother know that I'm always around to belittle them. It's a great family dynamic.

People always ask if I'm ever curious about my biological family and if I've ever considered trying to find them. I am a little curious, but I don't want to search for them. For all of my lavish dreams of who they are, I only have one nightmare. That I find them in a trailer park somewhere on tornado alley. No thank you. I'll just hold onto my unrealistic fantasies of wealth and prestige.

Boring Me

I have had nothing to write about recently. How sad for me. Ah well. Brian and I have been carpooling to work/school together this last week. Not all week, but a couple of days. I kind of like it even though it means I have to stay at work until 5. It's been a nice change. We stop off at the Maverick and get coffee before we get on the freeway. Having someone in the car makes the commute much quicker. Other than that, my life has been the same since I last wrote about anything pertaining to my life. Boring!

I'm The Pixies, I Don't Know What That Means

You rule. in 15 years, you won't be as known as you
are now, but most of the people that will know
you then will like you (or else I'll beat them
with a stick). You're nice to listen to.

What band from the 80s are you?
brought to you by

In A Mood

I'm in a mood today. You know, the mood. The ever infamous bad mood. The mood where you snap at people for no reason in particular. The mood where you get so angry about inconsequential things. That's my mood right now-- today. I need the day to end but I have a little while to go yet. Maybe I just need to relax, but I can't seem to make myself. I am drinking a beer. I'm hoping it will take the edge off. I know, that's alcoholic speak. But, I need to do something. Venting on blogger helps a little.

I have been posting quite a bit lately. It's funny, this blogging thing. I'm completely addicted. I want to read everyone's blogs. Some people are amazing writers. Some people are okay and some are just plain blah. I like them all. Okay, not completely true. I just read one that was pornographic. No pictures, but the words were very descriptive. For some reason, I'm not comfortable sitting here by myself reading porn. I think it may be the fact that someone could come in at any minute and ask what I'm doing. I suppose I just don't want to get caught. ;)

I have also been taking quite a bit of those quizzes on Quizilla. I'm not sure why, but they're interesting. When I took the Peanuts quiz it asks what your best characteristic is and then gave a huge list to chose from. I told Brian I thought mine was probably selflessness. Then we both laughed. I think he was laughing for longer than I was. Anyway, I asked him what he thought mine really was. He said cleverness. I'm not sure if he was serious, but I think it may have been one of the nicest things he's ever said. Anyway, I'm done and I'm feeling a little better and a tad bit emotional. I have no reason why. I'm going to find another quiz to take.