Pink Sheets

Saturday, November 05, 2005

From Baby to Trash to Hair

You girls are just so sweet. I can't promise that there will be a post the exact day the baby is born, but there will be something soon after. In fact, I'm thinking that I'll have quite a bit of blogging time after the baby is born. Yes, babies can be demanding and time consuming, but they sleep a lot and the other kids aren't here all the time, so I should be a blogging fool in a couple of weeks. I just hope I have a lot to talk about.

Right now you just get a summary of what's been going on.

-My last doctor's appointment was on Halloween. I was pleased that I hadn't gained any weight in the last two weeks putting my total weight gain at 33 pounds. Can you believe it?! I am so happy with myself. My goal was to only gain 25 pounds and be completely healthy and fit for this pregnancy, but I'm pleasantly surprised at 33. I have been a little crazy with the sweets this time around and was worried I would hit 40 or more pounds. Of course, I still have 2 weeks to go and there is Halloween candy leftover.

-I had my first baby shower on Thursday with my work and Brian's family. I now have a large supply of onesies, receiving blankets, and diapers. I didn't get anything big, but we were already given most of the big stuff. I did a load of laundry and I don't think I've ever seen so much pink in my life. And Darby wears a lot of pink.

Darby went to the shower with me and she was so funny. She is usually so reserved and shy around large groups of people but not that night. She was talkative and friendly and social. She is so excited for the baby. Especially now that we have all these new things for her.

-I had my second baby shower yesterday afternoon with my family. It was a small gathering, but I'm glad it worked out that way. My family has a tendency to drive me insane and only having to deal with my mom and sisters was less stressful than if step sisters, a step mom, and sister in law were thrown in too. I was a little peeved about the sister-in-law not coming though. Her daughter just had a baby shower and I attended. Plus, it was the most awful baby shower I have ever been to in my life. My brother decided to hook up with someone who is the epitome of white trash.

Let me just go into my sister-in-law's version (not to be confused with the one my sister had yesterday) of a baby shower since I feel like writing. Darby and I arrive at the shower, on time might I add. We walk in and everything is decorated with baby shower decor and there is a wide variety of food on the table. It looks good. Until you look up and there is a swarm of like twenty flies on the ceiling. Has anyone not heard of a fly swatter? And there's the horrible, horrible smell of smoke filling the air because people are smoking in the kitchen. Yes, smoking. At a baby shower. Um, this isn't a god damn bar, it's a fricking baby shower with pregnant women and babies. My God!! Anyway, to top it off one of the girl's dropped the punch bowl, which broke and cut her hand requiring her to go the emergency room. So, basically that was an excuse to put everything on hold and have all the guests sit there for an hour doing absolutely nothing.

Do you know why we did nothing? I know, you thought I explained it with the emergency room story, but that's not the whole picture. We sat there and did nothing because my sister-in-law thought that was a good time to take a shower and spend the next 45 minutes in the bathroom. WTF!!!! It was seriously tacky. Darby leaned over and asked me if they call it a baby shower because people come and take showers. No Darby, I'm afraid that isn't the reason it's referred to as a baby shower. I guess in the world of white trash, that's the definition of baby shower, but in a civilized world where the rest of us live, a baby shower is nice party, where people eat and drink punch and have pleasant conversation. In a civilized world, people go to baby showers to play cutesy games and give sweet, adorable gifts to the mother to be. It is usually not an event where one host ends up in the emergency room and the other ends up in the bathroom the entire evening while the guests sit around smoking cigarettes and drinking beer. Okay, there wasn't beer that I saw, but I wouldn't have been surprised if there had been.

Anyway, Darby and I managed to sneak out of the party after an hour and half, without playing games, or eating cake, or watching the presents being opened. We did leave with a balloon and the smell of smoke in our clothes and hair. Let me just tell you that I will never go to any sort of party there ever again. I mean, I think my brother's great, but the fact that he picked such a tactless bitch to marry makes me worried that he isn't quite right. Sorry!! I don't mean to be snob but give me a break.

Oh, and to clarify, just because one is poor does not automatically categorize them as white trash. My sister does not have a lot of money but she managed to put together a nice little gathering with decorations, cake, and food. I arrived, and while they weren't quite ready for me, within fifteen minutes we were all sitting around chatting and playing a cutesy game. After which, we moved to the kitchen where I was served my favorite pizza and salad. We then played another game, opened the presents, and had cake. You see how that party flowed? Darby and I were out of there with in an hour and a half. The same time the other party took to do absolutely nothing except serve food and make my poor little girl reek of cigarettes.

Side note: My other shower was even better planned and more organized than my sister's, but that's because the women who threw the shower are meticulous when it comes to details. However, I will spare you all the details. I will only say that it was awesome.

-Moving on, I had my hair done yesterday. Brian says that it doesn't look like $80 hair. I'm not quite sure what he was expecting, but I think I got my $80 worth. I'm only telling you the amount I spent to have my hair done, because it truly is an exceptional deal. For $80 I had my hair cut, colored, highlighted, and my eye brows waxed. This also included the tip. How many places can you have that done for under $100? Not many because I have shopped around. Plus, I love my stylist which I've mentioned here before. Anyway, he said for $80 he expected me to do something different. I didn't feel like different so I did the same and he isn't used to the $80 bill because I usually have my hair colored on a different day than I have it cut. Which is actually more money. She takes of $10 when you get it done at the same time.

Alright, I won't bore you anymore today. I will say that I'm now ready to have this baby and if she would just cooperate and come now I would be a very happy camper. However, it doesn't seem she's ready yet. Rude!


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