Just Venting
I started a new position recently. Same company, different department. The person whom I am replacing moved to a new position in a department that works very closely with mine. It’s been a blessing, actually, to have him so close. It’s been really easy to go around the corner to ask him about certain tasks and have him look at obscure situations that I deal with daily.
When I first began the position, I told Brian that this person is somewhat of a weirdo. He was always looking at my breasts. I don’t even have large breasts and it’s actually a rare occurrence for someone to be fixated on this part of my body. He told me that I shouldn’t think anything of it. That some people look elsewhere on a person to avoid eye contact. Maybe he was looking at my necklace. This made sense to me so I ignored the staring at my breasts.
Soon I began to realize that it wasn’t just the breasts he was looking at. He would do a once over every time I walked into a room or into his office. I thought I was just imaging the whole thing. Why would he look at me like that? People don’t do that. I was fine with playing dumb and ignoring the situation.
One day, a co-worker Tammy, came up and asked if I felt like he, whom shall remain nameless, was always checking me out or staring at me. I told her I did feel like that sometimes and she concurred. She has been receiving the exact same looks of lust. Just kidding. The looks are of creepiness. Anyway, we started to discuss this topic often and I started to think that we both were imaging the intensity of the situation by talking about it all the time. So we laid off and went back to ignoring it. One of the things that really helped me was to just look away when I noticed the staring. Then I could still talk to him with out feeling uncomfortable. (Plus, everyone else says he’s harmless, which I still believe to be true.)
Then one day he said something that made me want to jump out of my skin. I have this short, purple skirt I wear every once in awhile. It’s not terribly short but slightly above the knee. He stuck his head over my office wall and exclaimed, “oh! Your wearing a skirt!” Now this normally wouldn’t be bothersome except for the fact that I wear a skirt everyday. Why did he say that? It was too disturbing to even describe. Ooooh, your wearing a skirt.
This is when I began avoiding him. I started to utilize other co-workers as resources to my questions. This has helped a little, except for the fact he is always sticking his head over my office-cube wall to talk with me and stare at me. I hate it.
One day he even told me that I was cute when I was bossy. Brian teases me about this and I find the whole thing disturbing. Another incident recently occurred that made me want to disappear. This situation was mainly my fault. I was messing around on the internet and clicking on the blog links that take you to the next blog. I hit the link, minimized my screen and started doing something else. That’s when I heard a gasp from over the wall and he was there exclaiming, “what is that?!” To my horror it was a picture of a naked woman just sitting there taking up my entire screen.
Why? Why did that happen? It’s possibly the most humiliating thing I have ever experienced. He acts as if it’s an invitation from me to be a pervert now. I can’t stand this.
I’m a little worked up right now and occasionally it’s not this bad. Usually when I dismiss his comments and act irritated by him things begin to die down. Of course, once I begin to act normal they start up again. That’s okay,I just wish he would quit with the creepiness already. When he’s not being a total jerk he’s a really nice and funny person. He’s actually fun to be around, when he isn’t staring.
Brian doesn’t seem to take the perversity of the situation seriously. He just says that he must not be able to hide it as well as other people. I know I’m probably overreacting and I’m sure I’ll get over it. I just needed to vent a little.
When I first began the position, I told Brian that this person is somewhat of a weirdo. He was always looking at my breasts. I don’t even have large breasts and it’s actually a rare occurrence for someone to be fixated on this part of my body. He told me that I shouldn’t think anything of it. That some people look elsewhere on a person to avoid eye contact. Maybe he was looking at my necklace. This made sense to me so I ignored the staring at my breasts.
Soon I began to realize that it wasn’t just the breasts he was looking at. He would do a once over every time I walked into a room or into his office. I thought I was just imaging the whole thing. Why would he look at me like that? People don’t do that. I was fine with playing dumb and ignoring the situation.
One day, a co-worker Tammy, came up and asked if I felt like he, whom shall remain nameless, was always checking me out or staring at me. I told her I did feel like that sometimes and she concurred. She has been receiving the exact same looks of lust. Just kidding. The looks are of creepiness. Anyway, we started to discuss this topic often and I started to think that we both were imaging the intensity of the situation by talking about it all the time. So we laid off and went back to ignoring it. One of the things that really helped me was to just look away when I noticed the staring. Then I could still talk to him with out feeling uncomfortable. (Plus, everyone else says he’s harmless, which I still believe to be true.)
Then one day he said something that made me want to jump out of my skin. I have this short, purple skirt I wear every once in awhile. It’s not terribly short but slightly above the knee. He stuck his head over my office wall and exclaimed, “oh! Your wearing a skirt!” Now this normally wouldn’t be bothersome except for the fact that I wear a skirt everyday. Why did he say that? It was too disturbing to even describe. Ooooh, your wearing a skirt.
This is when I began avoiding him. I started to utilize other co-workers as resources to my questions. This has helped a little, except for the fact he is always sticking his head over my office-cube wall to talk with me and stare at me. I hate it.
One day he even told me that I was cute when I was bossy. Brian teases me about this and I find the whole thing disturbing. Another incident recently occurred that made me want to disappear. This situation was mainly my fault. I was messing around on the internet and clicking on the blog links that take you to the next blog. I hit the link, minimized my screen and started doing something else. That’s when I heard a gasp from over the wall and he was there exclaiming, “what is that?!” To my horror it was a picture of a naked woman just sitting there taking up my entire screen.
Why? Why did that happen? It’s possibly the most humiliating thing I have ever experienced. He acts as if it’s an invitation from me to be a pervert now. I can’t stand this.
I’m a little worked up right now and occasionally it’s not this bad. Usually when I dismiss his comments and act irritated by him things begin to die down. Of course, once I begin to act normal they start up again. That’s okay,I just wish he would quit with the creepiness already. When he’s not being a total jerk he’s a really nice and funny person. He’s actually fun to be around, when he isn’t staring.
Brian doesn’t seem to take the perversity of the situation seriously. He just says that he must not be able to hide it as well as other people. I know I’m probably overreacting and I’m sure I’ll get over it. I just needed to vent a little.
Wrapped up by Jolynn at
7:06 PM
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